It has been so interesting to have "twins" for the past two years--boys born within a few months of each other.
As I watch the different ways in which they take on the world, I am struck again by the beautiful diversity among us.
Who knows what parts of our foster son are there because of what he has lived through, and what parts of him are divine design? As tempting as it is to take credit for the sweetness and light in our children--and blame their odd behaviors on the GMO's we inadvertently ate during our last trimester of pregnancy--ultimately it does no good to analyze origins.
Reality is what it is, regardless of where it came from, and so I am learning to appreciate the little firebrand who lives here.
Dragonslayer, Part 2
Kaiden and I went to his kindergarten orientation last week and he was TERRIFIED--of the principal who greeted us out front, of the enormous playground, of the cafeteria, of the lockers, the school buses, his teacher. Everything.
I knew it because his hackles were up. He was muttering and kicking the back of my seat on the way there.
The principal who asked for a high five got a death look.
The playground monitor got one too.
I commented on how nice his teacher seemed.
"I'll kick her," he said.
We took a ride on the bus.
"I hate this bus," he said. "And I'll kick it."
And he did, as soon as we got off.
It was a tiny kick and he did it while clutching my leg,. More of a gesture, but it illustrated something to me about this boy. He will not be taken down without a fight. He faces fear with fury, answering every perceived threat by calling it's bluff.
As much as I would rather see him take life more in stride, there is something intriguing about a diminutive boy offering a smack down and a boot to the neck to his foes, regardless of his power to deliver on the threat.
Could God not use this impulse? Might the Biblical David not have had these leanings, as he battled the lion and the bear in his father's fields, and later, as he faced Goliath?
Obviously, the unsanctified version of this behavior is dangerous and destructive, but redeemed! Such possibilities!
So,we prayed about this transition all week, and the end of the story is happy. Kaiden went to school bravely today. He helped me load his backpack last night. He said hello to his bus driver this morning. He came back with lovely drawings and a smiling face. He faced his dragons, and won!
Jude too, is coping with the onset of kindergarten. His first day began with the crushing realization that school is not all paste and scissors, and ended with the revelation that "read-alouds" involve books without pictures on subjects of Mom's choosing. (I did close out the afternoon with a marathon of "Little Critter" books, because, despite trying to make today light-hearted and fun, I felt responsible for taking the shine off of his scholastic expectations.)
As I tucked Jude in tonight, he patted my arm and said, "School was good today, Mom. Now that I know how to do it, tomorrow you can just teach Elijah and Isaiah." Confidence? Constructive criticism? Forgiveness? All three? I love his tenderness of spirit.
Kaiden ended his day by giving me a bear hug and saying,"Tomorrow, I'm going to do EVERYTHING!"
A worthy goal for any Dragonslayer. I love his daring vision.
Two beautiful boys, so many kinds of bravery...
