Our family was so normal, and our lives were so mundane in comparison to our friends—and usually I was content to have it so. In fact, I see now that I had a supremely charmed childhood, but at that moment, in the bright glare of another family’s yearly highlight reel, shadows fell over my own good life and gave rise to a seedling of discontent.
Now, by the grace of Facebook, we all get the hour by hour opportunity to hold the nitty gritty of our real lives up against the airbrushed high points of our friends’ lives and either feel inadequate or elated over the steady stream of exciting events and achievements of hundreds of close friends, acquaintances, and strangers. I hope you do better at that balance than I do. The number of prayer requests alone and the myriad opportunities to serve special people can lead to emotional overload and even burnout if we are not careful.
I confess to adding a skewed picture of our good life to your Facebook feed this year. Yes, we had some real triumphs—a college graduation, sports victories, sweet moments of familial bliss, miscellaneous academic successes, celebrations of friendship, and milestones of growth in our children.
But we also had (more) health scares, job losses, moments of selfishness and squabbling, broken friendships, and moments when we didn’t live up to anyone’s standards of kindness, goodness, or self-control. Trust me, no one wants to see those lowlights, but neither do I want anyone to think we have achieved model family status.
So, what is my point? And what is the use of a Christmas letter in an age of social media? I guess I am glad of the opportunity to lay down a tangible expression of gratitude to the God who SEES. In some manner, I feel that we humans have a desperation to both see and be seen (otherwise why would we spend an average of two hours a day chasing information and approbation on our phones?)
And Christmas is the season that, more than any other, should call us away from that endless pursuit to marvel over the fact that no matter how obscure or notorious we are in the eyes of the world, the Almighty God holds us in His gaze entirely-- not just our well-framed, well publicized exploits, but also our dirty deeds, our deepest desires, our uncelebrated virtues and secret vices, our unheralded sacrifices and unconfessed selfishness.
We are seen in our entirety in a sort of divine Facebook feed that stretches from the dawn of time to the end of all things and contains every second of our conscious and unconscious existence.
Lest the thought of that level of scrutiny drive you to despair, remember that we are not merely seen completely, but also loved intensely and entirely to the point that God condescended to trade eternity and omnipotence for the constraints of time and flesh on our behalf. “God loved the world so much that He gave His one and only Son, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life.” John 3:16
God saw all the lovely and unlovely things about you, unfiltered, unsorted, uncovered, unedited and found you worth following—down to the brokenness of earth and through the barrenness of death so that He could invite you to truly know Him and ultimately live with Him forever.
To all of you whom we are privileged to know and care about on this earth, I pray you will find time to pull your gaze away from all the good things this season brings and find a quiet space to ponder the best news that ever broke upon any news feed anywhere at any time in history.
As always, you are in our hearts and we hope that you will come and see us whenever life brings you close to our neck of the woods! Merry Christmas!
“For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” 2 Chronicles 16:9
“But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the ages to come He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. “ Ephesians 2:4-7
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How God Showed His Love to Us Through
Unexpected Circumstances This Year
A 2018 Christmas Reflection
by The Birmingham Family
As door after door was shut not just in my academics but also in my personal life, I cried out to God, asking what He was trying to teach me. The answer came quite clearly: That behind every ‘no’ is a bigger ‘yes.’ Even though my plans may have changed, my purpose has not. Even if I don't know what I'm doing next year, I am still called to serve him here today. He has taught me that when I don't know the answer, He is still God. When I can't understand the reason, He is still good. When it's not what I had wanted, He gives more grace to accept no for an answer and seek His face and what He wants for my life.
One of my favorite songs by Shane and Shane says, "Though You slay me, Yet I will praise you. Though You take from me, I will bless your name. Though You ruin me, Still I will worship, Sing a song to the one who's all I need."
Christina (20): 2018 has been quite the year for me. As I look back at my journal entries from 2018, I spot a theme. Hardship often brings gigantic blessings. The kind of hardship that cuts my selfish wants out and carves me into the woman God wants me to be. The hardship of not wanting to wait for good things but making myself do it anyway because the gems will be so much more precious at the end of the wait. The hardship of almost failing most of my classes last year, and then getting meds to help me concentrate which brought me from barely scraping by to becoming an A student this year. The hardship of losing some friendships and yet the blessing of cultivating stronger ones with the people who choose to stay with me.
This year has not been easy, but I am blessed beyond what I deserve. One of my favorite quotes is, “Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.” – C.S. Lewis
Elijah (16): Now that I think back on my year, it has been tougher than I remembered! First, this is my second year of high school and has been a challenge. I feel though that I have better embraced the responsibility that comes with school as well as the things that come with being an older brother.
I also had quite a difficult struggle this summer. I was in the middle of baseball season when I fractured my spine. I was devastated that I could not finish my season of baseball with my team. God taught me through that one bad thing both patience and trusting him and his timing. He was in control and only three months later I was in physical therapy, and then in a couple weeks, back playing basketball.
Though I may not be completely in shape for the season, it is better than being in a brace for life which my doctor said was very probable with many kinds of breaks. I have been blessed, and I am so grateful for those who helped me through.
Isaiah (13): This year I realized I need to try harder to be grateful for my brothers. It is easy to see them as annoying, but here is what I like about them. Elijah is good competition for me in…everything. He always reminds me when I am doing something wrong (thanks, Elijah!) and helps me when I get off track. Jude knows everything about everything about sports, which is nice, so I don’t have to look stuff up for myself. Kaiden is good at making conversation and is pretty funny, but please don’t tell him I said so because I will never hear the end of it.
I’m glad God gave me brothers. Usually😊 Because I basically have three people to try to beat, which may help me rise to my full potential, and vice versa.
Jude (11): This year, I was playing on a great baseball team and we won every game and made it to the league championship and thought we would win no problem, but we lost. In spite of that, our coach paid for our entire team to go to a Whitecaps minor league game and we got to go out on the field with the players at the position we played on our league, which was fun.
In August, my brother knocked my glasses off and they fell lens first on the cement and broke. It was two months until I got my new glasses. It was hard to wait but it made me thankful for my new glasses and being able to see.
For Thanksgiving, we went to my cousin’s house and we had such a feast! I was also thankful that we got to spend time working together outside.
Kaiden (11): I almost got knocked out at basketball practice yesterday, but I didn’t. I’m thankful that God has kept me safe in sports. I am also grateful for Classical Conversations. We have a new tutor and I really like her. I’m also doing Essentials for the first time which is hard, but I enjoy playing the Battleship math game. I am also going to try out for Memory Masters.
Keira (9): “I am thankful to God because He makes me brave.” –the words of a little girl who works hard to sort out all the sights and sounds and words and expectations that this world throws at her. Yesterday, she stood with her classmates in front of a hundred parents at her 3rd grade Christmas concert. She did not sing, and she barely blinked through five songs, but for her it was the emotional equivalent to any one of us giving an impromptu speech to the U.N General Assembly! And she did it!
Keira was diagnosed with a form of autism this year, and this has helped us know how to go about helping her navigate life and learning. She has a beautiful, loving, trusting heart and we are blessed by her every day.
Jamey and Sandra: At this time last year, we did not know that simply unloading some groceries would cause a disc to rupture in Jamey’s back compressing a nerve in his leg. Spine surgery followed soon after, and then an unplanned “vacation” of 3-6 weeks for recovery.
A week after returning to work part time, a bigger change was in store. After 11 years of developing a combined pediatric and adult rheumatology practice, Jamey was told that his contract to practice at the Children’s Hospital would not be renewed. The hospital had decided to no longer work with subcontracted employees, and Jamey was one of the ones let go.
The timing of this massive career change could not have been much worse, with the recent forced time off and still being physically low. The influx of Jamey’s pediatric patients created a situation at his private practice which made it clear that he would not be able to practice there in the long term, and so he made the difficult decision to part ways.
The departure from two busy practices at the same time made it difficult to maintain continuity of care for many long-standing patients. We had more than a few anxious moments this year, but also saw the provision of God and the overwhelming support of many colleagues and patients who sent notes and expressed their care and concern in unexpected and often touching ways. God showed His great faithfulness to our family in both the known and the unknown.
Ultimately, all the changes opened the door for a new opportunity, and Jamey, a lifelong Ohio State Buckeye fan, began a brand new combined pediatric and adult rheumatology program through Metro Health, an affiliate hospital of the University of Michigan! That irony is not lost on us!
Jamey has ambitious long-term goals for how he hopes the program will develop, and a vision for an intensely patient-centered, holistic medical practice, filled with people who share the same goals. The transition has left him busier than he has been at any time in his rheumatology career, but the prospect of growth and the level of support he has received make it all worthwhile.
We are both thrilled and amazed at how the events of the year worked out to create a practice situation which is exactly what he has always dreamed of having but would probably never have sought out without an external push. So, we are extremely grateful!
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