Ode To Uninvited Guests
Beloved children, shut the door.
(I know I've mentioned this before).
Each time you manage to escape,
You leave the blessed door agape.
The heat blows out, the leaves blow in
And also, much to my chagrin,
Animals of every sort
Waltz in and wantonly cavort
In random corners, closets, drawers,
Entryways, and kitchen floors.
Reptiles, mammals, birds, and bugs,
Showing off their ugly mugs,
Sharing all our sacred spaces,
Chirping, buzzing, leaving "traces".
(I know I've mentioned this before).
Each time you manage to escape,
You leave the blessed door agape.
The heat blows out, the leaves blow in
And also, much to my chagrin,
Animals of every sort
Waltz in and wantonly cavort
In random corners, closets, drawers,
Entryways, and kitchen floors.
Reptiles, mammals, birds, and bugs,
Showing off their ugly mugs,
Sharing all our sacred spaces,
Chirping, buzzing, leaving "traces".
Your inability to close
The door is threatening my repose.
For instance, let us take this snake.
(Yes! Take her! Please! For heaven's sake!)
All I wanted was a snack.
I got instead, a heart attack.
While I was reaching toward a shelf
She casually introduced herself
And pointed to the friend beside her,
An obviously pregnant spider.
I did not think this very nice
Because it made me panic. Twice.
Enlisting help, I managed to
Re-acclimate the motley crew,
But in the process, sad to say,
My appetite went clean away.
The door is threatening my repose.
For instance, let us take this snake.
(Yes! Take her! Please! For heaven's sake!)
All I wanted was a snack.
I got instead, a heart attack.
While I was reaching toward a shelf
She casually introduced herself
And pointed to the friend beside her,
An obviously pregnant spider.
I did not think this very nice
Because it made me panic. Twice.
Enlisting help, I managed to
Re-acclimate the motley crew,
But in the process, sad to say,
My appetite went clean away.
I'll end up in the loony bin
If you keep letting wildlife in.
I'm growing jumpy, nervous, pale,
Hearing squeaks and seeing tails
Which may or may not really be
Existent in reality.
A bolted door, a fastened screen
Is all that's standing in between
A pleasant mom and one who shouts
And gasps and waves her hands about.
If you keep letting wildlife in.
I'm growing jumpy, nervous, pale,
Hearing squeaks and seeing tails
Which may or may not really be
Existent in reality.
A bolted door, a fastened screen
Is all that's standing in between
A pleasant mom and one who shouts
And gasps and waves her hands about.
Choose you this day what you will do
'Cause if I'm going to run a zoo
I'll charge admission by the day,
Set up concessions, make you pay
Outrageous prices for your lunch,
Sell your toys to hire a bunch
Of carpenters and masons whom
Will cheerfully convert your room
To an authentic habitat
For all the horrid creatures that
You roll out the red carpet for
'Cause if I'm going to run a zoo
I'll charge admission by the day,
Set up concessions, make you pay
Outrageous prices for your lunch,
Sell your toys to hire a bunch
Of carpenters and masons whom
Will cheerfully convert your room
To an authentic habitat
For all the horrid creatures that
You roll out the red carpet for
When you refuse to shut the door.
