Grateful

Echoing the sentiments from a dear friend's Facebook page, I would just like to publicly express my appreciation to my older children, who showed me great tenderness on a day when I was feeling particularly frail, and blessed me beyond measure.  

I am truly amazed sometimes to see them step into the position of strength in our relationship--to be the initiators, the spontaneous givers of a gentle squeeze, a tender glance, or sweet words of grace. 

I had a *tiny* fit this afternoon after a particularly harrowing nap time routine, wherein I went to my bedroom and cried at the foot of my bed and told God that I was done, done, DONE.  That it was too much.  That this was impossible to expect of anyone, especially me.  That I didn't feel that He was showing up for the game even after I begged so hard, so often, and with all these tears. 

And after that, I felt a little hand on my arm and heard Elijah's voice say, "I'm so sorry, Mama.  I just wanted to tell you that I finished up all my schoolwork on my own, so you don't need to explain it to me today."

And then later, I walked through the living room and saw Isaiah sitting quietly, reading.  He looked up at me with the kindest eyes and smiled and told me he loved me and offered to listen out for Keira if I wanted a nap. 

And then Jude, who had apologized all day for things he didn't even do, told me I was "so sweet, and pretty too."  With my puffy eyes and red nose!

My girls are normally first in the role of emergency encouragement on the occasions when I really need it, but they were not home today, and to see my little men rise up and BE the hands of Christ to me was more than compensation for my rough afternoon.  And a humbling answer to my question of where God's strength was when I needed it. 

We are learning Romans 12 as a family right now, and the part that came to mind was verses 6-8, which says, "We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; ⁷ if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; ⁸ if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully."

Any number of those would have been good for me to recall during my pity party, but better late than never.  And beautiful to see them remembered and lived out in the lives of my little ones. 

So thank you, sweet soldiers!  I love you very much--